How You Get Wet, Why You Get Wet, & How to Stay Wet

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Women tend to get wet when they feel horny. Wetness is a form of personal lubrication, aka arousal fluid, which helps prepare you for penetration. However, some women may struggle with it, which is totally fine. Hopefully, these how-to-get-wet tips will help you, and if not, it is best to go to speak to your doctor.

What Is Arousal Fluid?

Arousal fluid is what your body creates down there when you are ready for some action. You can also call it vaginal lubrication. It is more of the normal fluid that your body makes as a way to clean the vagina, in fact. The main purpose of arousal fluid, however, is to make sex/mating easier and more pleasurable. Plus, it can make sex last longer. Also, the amount of vaginal fluid can differ from woman to woman.   

It comes from your Bartholin’s glands which are on the sides of the vaginal opening. The everyday fluid comes from the glands that are on the walls of your cervix. However, sometimes the wetness can increase thanks to the Skene’s glands (found near the urethra, which causes squirting), but many researchers disagree with this. But, your labia also does get wet. That happens because there is a rush of blood to your genitals.

How Can I Get Turned On?

Every person is different when it comes to arousal. However, the most common way to do it is to enjoy foreplay. That can include making-out, dry humping, fingering, oral sex, etc. However, even the classics such as dirty talking or kissing can do the trick.

There can be several ways that you can turn yourself on, such as using sex toys, role-playing, experimenting, etc. The best thing to do is to explore your body and find your erogenous zones and feel what works best for you. Remember that everybody is different. That is why exploring and feeling/listening to your body can help out a lot.  

But, some women cannot create enough vaginal wetness to make sex feel good. The other name for this phenomenon is arousal non-concordance. We can describe it as being a disconnect between how someone feels and how their body (i.e., vagina) reacts. It can happen to every woman, and it could be thanks to several factors such as: 

  • Breastfeeding
  • Taking antidepressants or antihistamines
  • Smoking cigarettes
  • Using hormonal birth control 
  • Not drinking enough water
  • Stress

What If I Can’t Get Wet?

That is where lubricant/ lube comes in. It is used by a lot of people, men included, to make sex more pleasurable. While some people may think of it as unnecessary, a lot more see the value in it. Even if a woman can create a lot of arousal fluid, she may still want an extra boost in wetness just to make sex more fun. Plus, it can also help decrease stress.  

Let’s expand on that last point. Stress could be one of the factors that aid vaginal dryness or a decreased amount of arousal fluid. Or just kill their sex drive altogether. Therefore, if you have a bottle of lube at hand, you would not have to stress about not being moist enough. Your mind would be free, and your body would follow. There are also different types of lubes, and some of them have different flavors to make oral sex tasty. 

Know more about vaginal dryness in this article.

Which Lube Is Best for Me?

There are three different types of lubes: water-based lube, silicone-based lube, and oil-based lube. The type that you want to use all depends on your sex life, obviously. But, we would suggest that you should be careful because oil-based lubes do not go well with latex condoms. They can break them. Therefore, the best bet would be to go with silicone or water-based lubricant unless you are planning for a baby.  

Water-based lubes can be thin or thick, depending on the formula. A thick one would be good for anal sex. You may have to apply it a few times during those long sex runs. It would work well with silicone sex toys, too, so that is a plus. And it is easy to wash, which you would have to do. Otherwise, it would get sticky when it dries. 

Silicon-based ones can last longer than water-based ones, and you can use them if you are having sex in the shower. It is also thinner as well as slicker for long sex sessions. It can also double as a sensual massage product since it does not get sticky when dry. But, you would have to use soap to get it off. 


Getting wet is a way to make sex longer and better. If you are not able to, have no worries. It is fine. There is lube to save the day.

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